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Thursday, 11 September 2008

9/11 and the Fuckery of the Election Campaigns

Oh God, I'd forgotten how much I hate American politics. At least in the UK we have the decency to be politely embarrassed about the whole thing. In America, the party you support have the power and the strategies to change the world for the better. But the other guys? Oh, the other guys are in league with terrorists. They hate The Family (which family is this, by the way?), and will have us all being ridden around like ponies with Muslims and Communists on our backs by the end of 2010. The other guys couldn't possibly lead the Greatest Nation (tm) because their leader is a woman / black / inexperienced / a bitch / republican.

I'll be honest, I don't even know which party is which. Paint one turd red and one blue and I'll be just as unwilling to swallow either, thank you very much.

And if you think I'm exaggerating, that they're not really all overdramatic fearmongers, I'd like you to see how much of this video you can watch before nominating him for an Oscar.

The reason it makes me so angry is that America was supposed to be our big chance at a blank slate. A truly equal society in which freedom and justice were available to all. Such lofty aspirations, and yet the election campaigns are just pigs in dirt, squealing as many buzzwords as they can.

Disclaimer: I don't hate Americans, I'm not Jeremy Clarkson. I've just never heard a political diatribe yet that I liked or agreed with. By the way, if pressed for a vote, I like Obama because he has a nice smile and waves a lot. (At least I'm honest about it.)


  1. Hear, hear! I'm with you on all that. I don't know much about either but I like Obama, because, as you said he has a nice smile and waves a lot. And the name John McCain just sounds cliche American president, and not a cool one.

  2. Very pleased to see that someone else has the same depth of understanding and grasp of American politics ;)

  3. John McCann as a name either makes me think of a) oven chips, or b) John McClane from Die Hard. And as much as it would be cool to have a Bruce Willis character as president, as this guy is (I think) 72, he might not be so good at the shooting bad guys while wearing his Mighty Vest...

  4. If you want to -really- hate American politics (or at least the american politics of 7 or 8 years ago), read Stupid White Men by Michael Moore. It'll have your bones tingling by the end...

    I stay away from politics. To put it into perspective, I hate the very idea of 'countries' and borders in general. Very much so. Needless to say I don't care much for this election. Either way the world is going to end up in the s****er while the new POTUS takes a huge cra...(Sorry, I'm going to far now!)

  5. Jenny - LOL! I knew the name sounded familiar. Oven chips it is. (I am not familiar with the Die Hard films as you know, but it would be a peculiar image.)

  6. I like Obama so far. McCain seems likeable in his own way, but I just don't like the Republicans or the way the US has been run since Bush took the help.

    Basically, it's like this, here are some sweeping generalisations.

    Republicans (e.g. Bush, McCain) - generally more right wing. Increasingly, sadly, these people are fundamentalist "neo-cons" rather than the traditionally fiscal conservatives.

    Democrats (e.g. Al Gore, Clinton, Obama) - generally more "left wing", and liberal.

    My hero and yours, Akira the Don, puts it like this:

    "Anyway. Last night, out of curiosity, we watched republican Veep hopeful Sarah Palin’s speech. And I was, once again, reminded of the difference between Republicans and Democrats.

    "Those filthy warmongering swine are HATERS! No lie, those guys are bonafide Warriors Of Hatred. It’s THEM all those So Solid songs were about. Gotta be. I heard more booing than cheering coming out of that pig-ugly crowd of cracka-ass-crackers. All that freakish woman (who has a voice like chalk on slate) had to talk about was what a pussy and a dreamer Obama is and how good McCain is going to be at war. War war war war. USA! USA! USA! USA! Oh, and she said some slick shit about how community organisers have no power. There’s a message for you. YOU HAVE NO POWER AMERICA! WAR WAR WAR! USA! USA! USA!"

    That's not even to mention the conspiracy theorist rumours that the US is riddled with secret "power behind the throne" societies that make the Freemasons look like the Disney club. No idea if any of that is true. I hope it isn't.

    Don't taze me, bro!!

  7. Hah, well! There you go then. Smiley wavy man 4prez. Mostly because he's an optimist. Sad thing is, I know the job will break him.

  8. Wow, that diatribe is sooooo cool, had me crackin' up - and I didn't even get to the video yet. I haven't read the rest of the blog yet, but that one post gets it a place on my List of Blogs.


  9. Well, thank you very much! I'm pleased and flattered.

  10. Hahahaha. I have to say as an American I find all of this extremely interesting and entertaining. I just feel obligated to point out a few things.

    That video clip is from cable news which is THE WORST source of news available in the US. You’re better off getting your news from a comic book. There are three major channels CNN, MSNBC, Fox News. They are all ridiculously biased to the point where it’s a joke. They’re more about entertainment and personalities than news. Everyone gets their news online now because of that. Please don’t take that seriously. Cable news magnifies the ridiculousness of the elections. There are two comedy shows “the daily show” and the “Colbert report” that make fun of all that stuff. Youtube / google them and check it out for a better perspective of what Americans are thinking.

    Also, even though I like Obama and will probably vote for him I feel should defend McCain. I’m not sure if you guys know, the guy is a serious bad ass. He was a fighter pilot in Viet Nam and was shot down. He was captured and tortured. They gave him a chance to go free b/c his dad was an admiral in the Navy but he declined because he knew they would use him as propaganda. How crazy is that? Another thing is before this election campaign McCain was known for going against the typical Republican (conservative) party line, very bi-partisan. I think he changed his tune so he could get elected. He ran against Bush before and lost because that was his reputation.

  11. Thanks Joe! It must be pretty irritating that this is the side of American politics that the rest of the world is seeing... believe me I understand.

    Also, the John McCain - Bruce Willis link is too strong to be ignored... I will have my people look into it.

  12. As an American, this made me smile!
    I hate politics, too, and hardly know whow to vote for.

  13. My word, that was one hell of a video. Rather liked 'the blind endorsing the bland', but other than that a very serious speech. Thank you for posting it.

    "Paint one turd red and one blue and I'll be just as unwilling to swallow either, thank you very much." Marvellous.



  14. Thanks Adam, nice to know you relate! x

  15. I'm ready to move out of the country. Both sides are presenting hatred of the other guy more than their own positives, each has stuff to hide and nobody really says exactly what they will do. But I do feel that the US just cannot suffer through another four more Republican years, and despite what he says McCain will just be a repetition. So I agree with Keith, thanks for the post (think I'll snitch it).
    But are politics in the UK really any better? (if so I might move there - need any programmers?)

  16. UK politics still have an element of the circus about them, but not to the same extent. As I said, we're kind of embarrassed about the whole thing.


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