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Saturday 23 June 2007

Three times is a charm

When God tells you something three times in one day, you should listen.

As some of you know, I've been working this weekend with a group of Christians from Maidstone. We wrapped things up tonight with a worship session, and (just like at Catalyst on Friday) I began to cry. I just felt crap about myself. I know God treasures me and everything, and I know some would tell me different, but somewhere inside me there's still a twelve-year-old girl who's convinced she's ugly and worthless.

One of the visiting girls came to pray for me. She pulled out her bible and read Romans 8:15, which says

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father."

After that, she began to tell me how important it was to know what it means to be a daughter of God. Just then, another girl came over and said God had just shown her a picture of a little girl looking up at her daddy with an expression of trust and love on her face. She said how important it is that I trust God as my father, and that all I have to do is take His hand.

I've just got home, tired from a long couple of days (and quite a lot and emotionally wearing week), and trawling through the humanbeatbox.com forum, I came across Romans 8:15 again.

Maybe I'm just hormonal. I fully accept that this may be the case. But I think God might be trying to tell me something as well.

And as for the Maidstone guys: they were the kindest people you could imagine, truly warm and friendly, and we've all been very blessed to have them with us.

3 comments:

  1. hey sweetheart, cant get on msn at the moment so thought i'd drop a comment here.
    was reading your blog and felt the need to pray for you, i also remembered this verse:
    proverbs 31:30
    actually the entire of proverbs 31 is about being a woman of god.
    i love it because it doesnt talk about being beautiful, it talks about all the qualities a woman of god should have.

    go read it, pray about it. i think you'll find you match the qualities more than you think.

    you're special and i send big hugs and continued prayers for you.

    p.s. read my blog, i also had a faith revelation.

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  2. Well, I'm afraid I can't quote bible... thingies (I don't know what the numbers are called... chapters, I suppose!) but I can say you ROOOOOOOOL!!! As for hormonal or not... just because there's another explanation doesn't mean you have to rule out all possibilities. Sorry I didn't ring you... long story. Long long story. Glad to hear you enjoyed it, not sure if I should be glad about the crying... depends if it was happy or sad tears.

    Also, tell your friend to watch Doctor Who tonight. My friend watched it and said it was fantastic!

    -FT xxxxx

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  3. God cares. God likes us. I have such a tenuous grip upon these concepts; oh yes I can appreciate His love as some broad concept, but when it comes down to actually caring, sometimes it takes something dramatic to make us realise that God really is closer than we think...

    I don't know why we have to struggle and find things hard. Jesus never said it would be easy but He did give an indication that it'd be worth it :)

    Please don't ever beat yourself up. I've had a lifetime of doing it and I'm black and blue but none the wiser! We sometimes expect so much of ourselves, but "...what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God." (Micah 6:8)

    I hope that you get some quality hugs this week :)

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