I feel oddly restless when I come online. There was a time I'd go to a forum, but I've more or less abandoned those. Or I'd log in to IRC, but I don't do that any more. And since I restarted my twitter account (foolish, foolish me), there aren't many people to talk to there either. So I fire up my laptop, open firefox, and feel...
Unsettled. Unhomed.
My dissertation is going to be about home, and what that means. As a student, I move from house to house every year, so that's not home. My parents' house isn't home, not any more. Home has become something a bit more elusive, a bit less defined.
So, I suppose part of me is looking for something to get obsessed about. A website or event or group of people I can relate to, connect with, belong with. Likeminded people. Ah well, I can keep dreaming. There may well be thousands of people with minds a lot like mine, but I wouldn't know where to find them.
Bear
Wednesday, 12 May 2010
Home
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I like that idea of writing about 'home'. I guess the task of life is to become home in one's own body, one's own life, one's own history. I have moments of feeling at home. Playing with a dog helps (mine has learned to stand up on his hind legs and paw at my typing hand and gaze at me reproachfully - guess that's enough typing).
ReplyDeleteIs it sad that when I think of home, I think of work? Hm. I guess because I really am at "home" with what I do every day and truly love it. So I guess home is a relative term?
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely agreed. I'm also on the same journey of finding my HOME as you have defined.
ReplyDeleteWhat is home is an interesting question. In a few days im going home, well at least im coming back to the UK for 3 weeks but is it home now ? not really. Maybe once im back on the Isle of Wight i'll feel differently but right now im not sure how to feel. is home with Jess.. the person i moved half way around the world to be with or is home with my family, the one place that all my memories lie.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments, they make for fascinating reading. It's such a highly charged concept, because everybody has a deep emotional understanding of what home means - it's just hard to put into words!
ReplyDeleteAshton, you're very lucky to have a job that feels like such a good fit. I can only hope I find something that suits me as well!
You started looking for ppl who share your feeling at the right place. Let me add my name to your list. I agree to what you mean. Home is elusive a concept for me, but to compensate I romanticize my hometown I guess...it works fine for me atleast for my writings I must say. I would love to read your dissertation/paper you are writing. Could you share?
ReplyDeleteThanks Wasted, I romanticise my hometown too. I haven't been back for ages so I think my friends are fed up of hearing me talk about it!
ReplyDeleteMy dissertation might be a game rather than an essay - it's a bit complicated - but yes, it will be publicly available, and I will link to it from my blog.
Thanks for commenting!