They're just a normal part of city living. We're used to seeing them flapping about in the streets, used to trying to avoid getting poked in the eye by one. We don't even blink when we see their mangled, pathetic remains lying in the road.
I am talking, of course, about umbrellas.
Don't get me wrong, I accept that they were a genius invention back in 1852, but this is the year 2009! We're living in the future now! Surely we can come up with something better than these wire contraptions that insist on turning inside-out at the slightest provocation?
This is what I was thinking about as I struggled home in the rain today. Well, technically I was thinking AWGH STOP TURNING INSIDE OUT, I SWEAR UMBRELLA, I WILL LEAVE YOU IN A TREE! but the basic sentiment is the same. Have we really got no better suggestions? At the very least someone should make an umbrella skirt, I think it's fairly obvious that they never keep you dry below the waist. Anyway. The sooner somebody makes a rainproof forcefield, the better.
Interesting thing for today: crayon art. I love unusual art forms, and this definitely qualifies! As always, the link will go up on the left.
(Also, quick reminder to
vote me up if you haven't already. Or even if you have. I'm not picky.)
Oh! Oh and another interesting thing: Pink dolphin found in the US. I'm no huge fan of pink, but on a dolphin, that's pretty freakin' rad.
Bear
Tuesday, 3 March 2009
We need a better idea
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Its funny you should write about that, i've just been to starbucks with my housemate who insisted that i take her spare umbrella. now, i haven't used one of these things since i was about four, and in the three minutes between home and starbucks it managed to drag me half way down the road when catching the wind, turn inside out and refuse to go back, and then get stuck when i tried to take it down. needless to say i refused the offer of it on the way home, preferring to get very wet than have to battle with this thing again!
ReplyDeleteUmbrellas are portable eye removers. Waterproof clothing is vastly superior in every way.
ReplyDeleteGoretex, eVent fabric, whatever - just so long as you're not walking around with a birdcage over your head.
Soft shell stuff is great, it's waterproof enough for the city, and it's light, comfy and nice to touch. Doesn't make that horrible SHWAP SHWAP noise that cheap raincoats do, which is important.
"AWGH STOP TURNING INSIDE OUT, I SWEAR UMBRELLA, I WILL LEAVE YOU IN A TREE!"
ReplyDeleteLOL had that experience once as well.. :)
Umbrellas are evil.
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for the link to the article on crayon art! Here is the link to that guys homepage, the rest of his artwork is also really neat. :)
http://www.christianfaur.com/
Yeah, I gave up with umbrellas too. It was about the same time as I moved to Cardiff - my last one I wrapped around a lamp-post in frustration and then hung from my ceiling like a dead-bat as an "art installation" surrounded by smartie tubes (like you do.)
ReplyDeleteHahahaaha! Howard, you are fantastic. Thumbs up.
ReplyDeleteThe Japanese have invented an umbrella that can't be turned inside out no matter how strong the wind. The shape is ugly, though. If there is one place where we need umbrella it's here in Japan. Hopefully they're working on the rain field as we're speaking...
ReplyDeleteI feel for you with the whole umbrella thing. What we really need is for someone to invent a sort of rainproof astronaut suit. It seems that even if your umbrella happens to save your skirt/pants your legs always get wet. Cruel wind!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I just have to say that Lisa Frank must be freaking out. Lisa Frank = prophet? (look at http://www.buy.com/prod/lisa-frank-70-page-theme-book-dolphins/q/loc/20269/202939068.html)
FOLLOW ME PLEASE! I am semi-interesting.
To be without bumbershoot would be very wet indeed!
ReplyDeleteHahah I agree. Umbrellas need some kind of redesign or something...
ReplyDeletehaha love this randomly funny blog. This was just what I needed to read after a long day of hanging out with emotional, teary-eyed girls.
ReplyDeleteSo true...
ReplyDeletehonestly, sometimes you'd be better off without an umbrella.. you still get wet.. <__<
xx
true.. so true.
ReplyDeletethe future of umbrellas :- http://gothamist.com/attachments/arts_jen/0804nubrellas.jpg
ReplyDeletea little less wind catching ?
oh and isnt that pink dolphin awesome! i posted that link on my facebook a few days ago (yesterday maybe ? i dont know when lol)
This Canadian requests that the forcefield be temprature controlled as well, so that we can wear shorts and tees all year long! February is so dreary...
ReplyDeleteBut your rainbows and humour are so cheerful!
Loving your blog!
I haven't used an umbrella in a long time. I just find it so bloody stressful. As if it isn't bad enough that it's raining on you, you then end up all sweaty and harassed battling with the umbrella as it makes you look like a fool. Nobody can have their umbrella turn inside out and still look cool. Fact.
ReplyDeleteI just go for the ol' coat over the head trick, does the job just fine.
And oh my god that dolphin is PINK! I thought it was going to have a slight tinge, not be full on Hubba Bubba, pepto bismol pink!
umbrellas aren't evil, they just don't work too well in stormy conditions. face it, if you are out and about, splashing through puddles and dodging raindrops then you are going to get wet. fact of life....if its warm i suggest a bathing suit. if its cold get inside immediately. other than that........bye 4 now, jc
ReplyDeleteFallen angel: Not bad! Not a complete solution, the legs'll still get wet, but a damn sight better than the average ;)
ReplyDeleteTaf, you're so right. We need to get some sunshine happening! Yesterday was quite nice here actually, but that was the exception that proves the rule.
The Girl, it surprised me too! Honestly that's the coolest albino animal I've ever seen. I can't think of a single good reason it should be pink, but I'm glad it is. ;) It makes the world more interesting, knowing that these things happening.
Haha.
ReplyDeleteDear Anna,
Alas I am but a passer-by but I just have to tell you that I like your style ^_^" I've never liked using Umbrella's, I'm always afraid they'll attract lightening... Irrational maybe. I like your idea about hte umbrella skirt though. You could start the newest bizarre trend in fashion.
Keep up the good work
xx
Someone once invented an "upside-down umbrella", which kept you dry while collecting water for you to use in everyday life.
ReplyDeleteEver get an idea and just run with it? Seems that guy did.
What about a giany plastic bag? Not only will it keep people dry but if thier ugly it will cover them completely
ReplyDeleteGreat post! haha, I never really thought that much about umbrellas.. but, wow--that pink dolphin, very cool. Thank you for sharing that with your fans, I would've never found that :D
ReplyDelete--Blake Eliza
Go to your local golf store, and get a wind proof umbrella. They are great,and they never fold upwards in the wind. Golf umbrellas are also big enough to keep more then just the top of your head dry.
ReplyDeleteHahaha - your post made my day :)
ReplyDeleteIt was raining quite a bit recently near where I live. I found it much more convenient to simpler get slightly *understatement* then to take out my umbrella :]
My friend used to wear a trashbag on rainy days. (: He says it beats an umbrella anyday.
I have found one use for umbrellas!!! Hitting annoying people. :D
ReplyDeletePersonally, I rarely use my umbrella (even though it is Van Gough Stary night and therefore surpassing all other umbrellas in awesomeness)
I use my hood! <= a hoodie is much more convienent then a stupid umbrella especially when going in and out of crowded school buildings.
Love your blog by the way! :)
Hahaah Jacqui, that's awesome. Starry Night is one of my favourite pieces of art.
ReplyDelete