No spoilers: LOST

There will be reviews of the finale springing up all over the internet in the coming days. They will range from "It was AWFUL" to "it was AWESOME," but that's not what I want to cover here. I want to talk about the part it's played in my life.

One of the main reasons I'm sorry to see Lost go is that it has served as a very effective, if transparent, excuse for hanging out with people I like for many years now. My family got me into it, having decided after the first three episodes that they liked it. I'm sure that, for them, the novelty wore off several seasons ago; and perhaps I'd have lost interest too, if it weren't for Stephen.

Stephen Wills is my honorary big brother. I've known him for my whole life, and craved his approval for about as long; in fact I'd say he was pretty instrumental in inspiring my lifelong love of geeks. I knew him when he was a blond-haired little boy playing with marbles, when he discovered Sonic the Hedgehog, when he was learning to drum and getting girlfriends... I'm a couple of years younger than him, so there was quite a while when we didn't really talk, but then we found out we had Lost in common. For a couple of seasons, my brother and sister and I would go to his flat to watch it with him. Then when he moved back to Newport, and I started doing my gap year work there, I'd watch it alone with him (and believe me, if I'd known how to hit on guys when I was 19, I would have done).

I grew up and moved away, although possibly not in that order; first to Plymouth, where I was alone, and then to Cardiff. In Cardiff I met Dan X. I picked up more or less where I'd left off with Stephen; going round to see him on a weekly basis and watching the latest episode. That's continued, sometimes with more people and sometimes not, right up until tonight. It's one of the things that helped me get to know a few people in Cardiff, so I guess it's one of the reasons this feels like home now.

This obsession has fuelled many discussions with my friends, ranging from vapid soap-opera style drama conversations through to philosophy and metaphysics. I'm helping to indoctrinate my friend Ben into the world of Lost, through which he's getting to know Dan as well. It's good to know that it's still doing that.

So I suppose it's time I found something new to obsess over. Any suggestions?

Kawaii LOST - Hurley and Smokey, originally uploaded by Jerrod Maruyama.

Lost girls

They are not bad children, the ones who go missing. Red Riding Hood, for example, was raised as well as most (and a great deal better than some.) She merely fell prey, as so many do, to the irresistable lure of the woods.

How many have been tempted astray by a wandering moonbeam? A white rabbit? The brightest flowers (always, somehow, just a little further off)?

The stars distract me. My feet to stray from the path, beaten by the feet of a thousand men; the only sure way home. My eyes turned skywards, I mindlessly walk into shadow so deep that I never
stop
f
.a
..l
...l
....i
.....n
......g...

Persephone, Alice, and me - we three
Went down to the forest to play.
Seph gave a shiver and ran to the river,
Just Alice and me got away.

Myself and Alice well knew, we two,
It's bad to stay out on your own.
We stayed close together 'til she chased a feather
And left me out there on my own.

And there was much rejoicing!

For months now, I've been nagging my parents to hunt throughout the entire house for a very precious bracelet that I'd left behind. With every passing week I lost hope, becoming more and more convinced that it was lost to the void. You know how when you lose something that was pretty much brand new, and it just stays new and unattainable in your mind forever? My beautiful bracelet was like that. I even had dreams where I found it and it wasn't quite the same as in the real world... a sure sign that I was forgetting it while obsessing over it at the same time.

My dad asked me where he thought I'd seen it last, and time and time again I told him that I had no idea, and that the only place I could remember leaving it was on the leg of an upturned piece of furniture in my old bedroom. (It's kind of turned into the junk room since then so there's no shortage of chairlegs hanging around, waiting to have hairbands and stuff left on them.)

It wasn't because it was expensive jewellery that I wanted to find it, it was because it was a special gift from my boyfriend's parents. They chose the charms specially with me in mind - a silver flip-flop and conch shell - because I was raised on an island, you see? And they gave me a third charm to me this Christmas - a beautiful silver bear. Bears have huge personal significance for me.

The bracelet was intended, partly, to be worn on a cruise this summer. My boyfriend's grandmother is taking the entire family, and apparently, I qualify! I didn't want to wear it until then (ironically because I had a suspicion I would lose it / drop it / have it stolen), but I was talked into it by his mother, who told me 'not to save it for best.'

Anyway, my dad hadn't found it, my mum hadn't found it, none of my siblings had seen it, and I was forced to conclude that it could have slipped off my wrist any time, any place. I prayed. This is a revelation I've been unsure how to introduce to you all, but I'm a Christian. Sort of. Was. Am. Well, I'm confused, essentially, so I was pleading with God saying "If you're really there, you know how important this is to me - please, please help me find it..." then I'd tail off and wonder if I was talking to myself.

Every day since I've been back, I've been having mini-hunts in every corner of this junk-packed house, in the futile hope that it'd turn up. Tonight I searched in my old bedroom again. I'd already looked, of course, but I had to do something.
"Dad's already tidied here loads of times... to be honest, if it was here, he'd have found it." That was my sister, Judith, getting ready for bed.
"I know," I said, "but it just feels better than doing nothing, you know?"

After a lot of organising, and sorting, and putting things into bags and throwing them away and finding books from years ago, I saw it. There, on the leg of an upturned stool, hidden away under an old computer desk, was my bracelet - paler than I remembered it, but just as beautiful.

The next few seconds sounded like this:

"I found it.

I FOUND IT."

Judith: "What?"

"I FOUND IT!

I FOUND IT!!

MUUUUM!!! I FOUND IT!"

I ran downstairs, my sister shouting congratulations after me, and my mum reaching out to hug me, almost as delighted as I was, because she knew how important this was to me, and how bad I'd felt for letting down my boyfriend and his parents. I called him with the good news straight away, of course! And then... we prayed. And I said thank you to the God that I can't quite not believe in however much I hurt sometimes.

Sitting on the sofa afterwards, I thought of a story Jesus told about a woman in a very similar position.

Luke 15 v. 8-10

The Parable of the Lost Coin

"Or what woman who has 10 silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not light a lamp, sweep the house, and search carefully until she finds it? When she finds it, she calls her women friends and neighbors together, saying, 'Rejoice with me, because I have found the silver coin I lost!' I tell you, in the same way, there is joy in the presence of God's angels over one sinner who repents."

So, it being a little late to call all my friends and neighbours together, I thought I'd share it with you. Because some things are just important.

Oh lucky me!

Gav emailed me the other day asking if I wanted to go in for a raffle to win some rugby tickets. I said yes, and we won! Hooray! That means that I'm gonna see Wales play the All-Blacks at the Millennium Stadium on Saturday. This is very exciting because it's going to be the first time I've willingly witnessed a sporting event live - or seen rugby live for that matter.

Every now and then I slip back into my island-girl mindset and I'm amazed by the things I have access to that I just didn't growing up. Electricity, healthcare... no, I jest; the Isle of Wight isn't as backwards as everybody thinks, it's just smaller and safer. But there are things I didn't discover until fairly late in my youth.


A few years ago, my aunt got me a pizza with a yummy sauce instead of tomato paste for the base. I made a mental note that when I moved away from home, I'd search for this pizza, because it was most probably the best I'd ever had! Y'see we didn't have Dominoes. Nope, not even one, not on the whole island. Or a Burger King, although this was no great loss to me as I'm a McDonald's gal.

We didn't have rugby, for some reason,and we didn't have silent discos. We didn't have - (snicker) - Organised Football Violence. I only discovered the existence of this utterly bizarre concept in the past couple of days. I don't think I've laughed so hard in ages!

Here's the idea. Some people, right, get into groups based on what football team they support. And, they, like, meet up with other opposing teams. And they fight! They fight each other! Organisedly! They wear special clothes that sound like they make them look like post-apocalyptic gangs! And they fight! Ok, explaining it to you it probably doesn't sound that funny, but I was creasing up. Apparently it's surprising that I've never heard of this phenomenon before.

Anyway, other good things that happened today include buying something very nice and meeting a snake. Fell asleep during Lost round Dan's, so I should get a reasonably early night in order to *gulp* face tomorrow...

Love! x

Oh! And an interesting thing: this man can do things with a sheet of A4 that I couldn't have dreamed of. Truly incredible art.

Not boobs.

Well, a bunch of strangers requested that I blog about boobs, so...

No.

Ah, sorry, did I disappoint you? But don't worry, I'm going to blog about something BETTER than boobs. Seriously. No kidding. Here follows a list if such things.

1) Ice cream.
It's been so long since I had Ben and Jerry's (indisputably the best ice cream ever conceived by man). Cookies and cream, phish phood (sp?), and above all, Dublin mudslide... I love the Irish cream in that. Leading me to number two good thing...

2) Baileys.
The only alcoholic drink that I actually like. It tastes like happy!

3) Lost.
Yes, I am addicted, but tragically I am several episodes behind everyone else. Steven, if you read this, I AM MOST DISPLEASED. I needs the Lost.

4) Music.
Into Nina Simone at the moment, she is an absolute legend!

5) Being funny.
I LOVE being funny. I don't know how often it happens, but when it does, it makes me feel good that I can make people laugh... sadly, I don't think I've found a medium that communicates my particular sense of humour. Video certainly doesn't. (Oh, on that note, I may not be making many more YouTube vids, and almost certainly no vlogs.) Writing? Well, I seriously hope I can be funny. Let me know.

6) Poetry. VASTLY better then breasts. I mean seriously, have you read the Raven? Sheer genius. I also recommend blue peace incantation, Salome and "Hole in the floor". Plus, of course, anything I've written. ;) (re-plugs http://creativesplurges.blogspot.com/)

7) Sunshine.
Not only a beautiful thing, which makes people happy (and tanned), but also the source of all life (indirectly, of course). And, to top it all, you can call people it and it makes them smile, so they actually become a little more sunshiney. Which is really rather special.




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LINKS to the poems I recommended

The Raven
Blue Peace Incantation
Salome (about 3/4 of the way down)
Hole In The Floor